Expectations
It's been two years since my Mum passed away and I wanted to share my thoughts on how I am dealing with my loss and also as a Counsellor how our own personal experiences can help to understand our clients that have also suffered their own loss. I started having therapy in April and I was expecting the process to be harder and emotional but after the first 1-2 sessions I started to question my process. I was expecting to become emotional and wanting to further explore my loss with my Counsellor. I also questioned if I would have engaged more with a female Counsellor and also questioned the diversity in the client /counsellor relationship as my Counsellor was from Spain and English was not his first language.
The Death of a Loved One
I recently experienced the death of my mother in June 2016 and would like to share some of my thoughts and feelings about living with the loss of a significant person in your life.
For me there was the shock and struggle with accepting that she had died and then I intentionally blocked the hurt and sadness that I knew I would have to deal with in my own time. I also couldn’t get my head around not seeing my mum again, not talking to her gain or touching her again.
I then immediately started to feel guilty for not spending more time with her and wishing I had taken her away on holiday more often or even day trips. I accepted that I had been selfish with my time which made me angry with myself.
There were also times when I couldn’t understand where my mum was now, which meant I was questioning my lack of faith in believing that she was in in heaven. I want to believe that she is now in a good place with God but I’m really struggling to fully commit this belief.
